Battle Reportz - Steven's Ork Army

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BATTLE REPORTZ
TWO LOSSES AN' A WIN. WE DON'T TALK ABOUT DA LOSSES. (WE DO, ACTUALLY.)

DA BOSS PAGE | PAINTIN' DA BOYZ | BATTLE REPORTZ

These are my last three games at the store. I wrote down what happened every turn on the back of my army list while we played, and Fabian and Chris checked them, so they're true even the parts where I lose. Each game is 1,000 points a side on a regular six-foot by four-foot table.

Battle 1: vs. Ultramarines (lost)
Battle 2: vs. Dark Eldar (lost)
Battle 3: vs. Ultramarines again (WON!!!)

HOW TO READ DA MAPS
Each map is the table seen from above. My side is the bottom row, the enemy's side is the top row. Every square is about nine inches. The letters are units, not single guys.

My Orks (green): B = Warboss, S = Slugga Boyz, H = Shoota Boyz, N = Nobz, T = Trukk, G = Gretchin, D = Dreadnought
Space Marines (blue): C = Captain, M = Tactical squad, V = Devastators, R = Rhino, L = Land Speeder
Dark Eldar (purple): A = Archon and his Warriors, W = Warriors, X = Raider, Y = Wyches, J = Reavers, Z = Ravager
Table: # = ruins, & = woods, O = objective, * = something blew up here

BATTLE 1: DA BLUE BOYZ GOT US
Saturday, August 7, 1999 · vs. Fabian's Ultramarines · 1,000 points · LOST

Fabian brought his Ultramarines: a Captain, two Tactical squads, a Devastator squad with a lascannon and heavy bolters, and a Rhino. We played with one objective in the middle of the table. Whoever has a unit sitting on it at the end of turn six wins. Fabian won the roll-off and went first.

SETUP

V		M	C	M
#				R
			O		&
	#
G	S	B	H	T	D

Everything lined up on my edge. I put the Trukk right out in the open because I wanted it to go fast. You can see where this is going.

TURN 1

V		M	C	M
#				R
			O		&
G	S	B	H	N	D
				*

Fabian's lascannon shot my Trukk before it moved an inch. It blew up, and two Nobz went with it. The other three got out. On my turn everybody ran forward. The Shoota Boyz shot at a Tactical squad with about forty dice and killed one Marine.

TURN 2

V		M	C	M
#				R
	S	B	O	N	D
	G		H
				*

Both Tactical squads shot my Slugga Boyz with their bolters and killed nine. My guys kept coming. The Dreadnought went into the woods, which slowed it down, which I forgot would happen.

TURN 3

V		M	C	M
#		S	B	R
			O		D
	G		H
				*

The lascannon hit the Dreadnought and it couldn't move for the rest of the game. My three Nobz charged the Captain by themselves and all three died. But the Slugga Boyz and the Warboss finally reached the Marines and charged! We won the fight. The Marines fell back, and then they just stopped and turned around, because Space Marines don't stay scared. That's their whole thing.

TURN 4

V		M	C	M
#				R
	S		H		D
	G
				*

The Captain came in and fought my Warboss, and my Warboss lost. Without him the Slugga Boyz lost the fight and ran. But my Shoota Boyz got onto the objective! For about five minutes I thought I had it.

TURN 5

V		M
#		C	M	R
	S	G	O		D
			H
				*

The second Tactical squad came up and rapid-fired the Shoota Boyz. They lost eleven guys and ran off the objective. The Grots ran for it, but they're Grots, and they didn't make it.

TURN 6

V		M
#		C		R
	S	G	M		D
			H
				*

The Marines walked onto the objective and shot the Grots. The Grots charged them anyway, which was very brave for Grots, and lost. Game over. Marines win.

WOT I LEARNED: Don't put the Trukk out in the open where the lascannon can see it. Don't send three Nobz at a Captain by themselves. And Space Marines are really, really good at shooting things that are running at them across an open field. Use the terrain.

BATTLE 2: DA POINTY-EARS KEPT RUNNIN'
Saturday, August 21, 1999 · vs. Chris's Dark Eldar · 1,000 points · LOST

Chris's Dark Eldar: an Archon with a squad of Warriors in a Raider, Wyches in another Raider, a Ravager, a squad of Warriors on foot, and Reavers on jetbikes. Dark Eldar are fast and hit hard, but they can't take a punch. The trick is catching them. We played for victory points: six turns, and you score the points for every enemy unit you wipe out. I went first.

SETUP

W		X	Z		X
	&					J

#				&
G	S	B	H	T	D

Same setup as last time, because I don't learn. Chris put his Reavers way out on the right.

TURN 1

W		X	Z
	&
X			N	*
G	S	B	H	&	D	J

I moved everything up and drove the Trukk as far as it could go. Chris's Ravager has three dark lances, and it blew up the Trukk. Again. One Nob died, four got out. His Wyches' Raider zoomed all the way around to my left, and the Reavers came down my right side.

TURN 2

	W		X	Z
		&
Y	*	S	B	N	*
	G			H	&	D
						J

Finally something went right. The Warboss and the Slugga Boyz charged the Wyches' Raider and smashed it to pieces. The Wyches jumped out, and on Chris's turn they charged my Boyz. Wyches are scary. They killed eight Boyz. The Ravager shot two of my Nobz, and the Reavers flew right over my army and started shooting my Grots from behind.

TURN 3

	W			Z
Y		&				X
	*	S	B	N	*
	#			H	&	D
						J

My Boyz won the fight because there were so many of them, and the Wyches ran. The Reavers killed a Runtherd and all my Grots panicked and ran off the table. Chris's Archon flew his Raider over to the other side. I couldn't catch anybody.

TURN 4

	W			*
Y		S	B	N		X
	*				*
	#			H	&	D

My last two Nobz charged the Ravager and wrecked it! Best thing that happened all day. My Dreadnought shot the Reavers with both big shootas and got them all. But the Warriors on foot kept shooting my Slugga Boyz with their poison guns, and there weren't very many Boyz left.

TURN 5

	S	B	*
Y		&	N
	*			*
	#			&	D
			A	X

Chris landed the Archon's Raider behind my Shoota Boyz and everybody jumped out and shot them, and then the Archon charged them. The Shoota Boyz broke and ran right off the table. On my turn, what was left of the Slugga Boyz charged the Warriors on foot and finally killed them.

TURN 6

Y	S		*
		&	N
	*			*
	#			&	*
			A	X

The Wyches came back and charged my Warboss, and they got lucky, and he died. The Archon's squad shot my Dreadnought and blew it up. When we added up the points, Chris had wiped out way more of my army than I had of his. Dark Eldar win.

WOT I LEARNED: You can't chase Dark Eldar. They're too fast. You have to make them come to you, or catch them when they land. Also, I need something faster than Boyz on foot. That's why I'm saving up for Stormboyz.

BATTLE 3: WAAAGH!!! WE WON!!!
Saturday, September 18, 1999 · vs. Fabian's Ultramarines · 1,000 points · WON

The rematch. Fabian had the same army as last time except he dropped some guys and bought a Land Speeder with his birthday money. We played for victory points. This time I had a plan. Jim, who owns the store, helped me make it. Hide behind stuff. Put the Grots in front. Send the Trukk the long way around. Fabian won the roll-off and went first, again.

SETUP

L			M	C	M	V
					R
	#					&
		&	G		#
	S	B	H	D		T

Everybody behind the woods and the ruins. Grots up front where the Marines would see them first. The Trukk all the way over on the right edge, behind the woods.

TURN 1

			M	C	M	V
L					R
	#		G			&	T
	S	B		H	D

The Devastators shot the Grots and killed eight. That's what Grots are for! Nothing else of mine was out in the open. On my turn the Trukk drove up the right side behind the woods, and everybody else moved up through the cover.

TURN 2

			M	C	M	V
L					R	N	T
	S	B		H		&
		&	G		D

The Land Speeder shot my Dreadnought and shook it up so it couldn't shoot. The Tactical squads shot the Grots again and they ran. But now the Trukk was right next to Fabian's Devastators, and my Nobz jumped out. Fabian said a word I'm not going to type.

TURN 3

	M		S	C	M	N
L			B		R		T
	#			H		&
		&	G		D

He shot one Nob and six Slugga Boyz. Didn't matter. The Nobz charged the Devastators and wiped them out completely. The Warboss and the Slugga Boyz charged the first Tactical squad and beat them, and they fell back. WAAAGH!!!

TURN 4

	M		S	B	M	N
L					R		T
	#			H		&
		&	G		D

The Captain charged my Warboss to get revenge for last time. And my Warboss WON. Gutrippa got his revenge instead. The Nobz charged the second Tactical squad. My Dreadnought shot the Rhino and it couldn't move anymore.

TURN 5

	M	S	B			N
L				H	R		T
	#					&
		&	G		D

The first Tactical squad came back and shot my Slugga Boyz, but the Nobz beat the second Tactical squad. My Boyz and the Warboss charged the first squad again.

TURN 6

	S	B				N
*				H	R		T
	#					&
		&	G		D

The Boyz finished off the first Tactical squad, and the Shoota Boyz shot the Land Speeder and it blew up. The only thing Fabian had left was a Rhino that couldn't move. ORKS WIN!!! Fabian shook my hand and said good game. Then he asked how much the Stormboyz cost.

WOT I LEARNED: Use the terrain. Grots in front. Trukk the long way around. And never give up on your Warboss.

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Want a game? I'm at the store most Saturdays from 1:00 on. [email protected]
Last updated September 19, 1999