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Read each one out loud. Out loud. In the car is fine; that's where I practice. If a word stops you, look it up in the dictionary. When you're done, check yourself against the answer key at the bottom, which is written in Phoenix.
LEVEL ONE: FRESHMAN
- Yinz want pop?
- Redd up your room.
- Watch it, them steps are slippy.
- Get a buggy.
- The car needs washed.
LEVEL TWO: SOPHOMORE
- Hand me a gumband so I can close up this bag of chips.
- She's so nebby she knows who called before the phone stops ringin'.
- Turn off the spicket, the hose is runnin' into the jaggerbushes.
- We're goin' dahntahn for the parade n'at.
- Get a pound of jumbo and a pound of chipped ham, and don't forget the buns.
LEVEL THREE: SENIOR
- Yinz kids redd up them toys and get aht of the crick before your dad gets home, the Stillers are on at one.
- The sweeper needs emptied and the dog wants walked.
- Kennywood's open, hon. (Say this one quietly.)
GRADUATE LEVEL: MY MOTHER'S SUNDAY PHONE CALL
My mother calls every Sunday at noon Pittsburgh time. That's nine in the morning here in the summer and ten in the winter, because Arizona doesn't do daylight saving time, and every April and every October she forgets and wakes us up. This is last Sunday's call, September 12, as near to word for word as I could get it down on the back of the church bulletin.
"Jackie? It's your mother. Are yinz all right aht there? It's hot? It's always hot. I don't know how yinz stand it.
Your brother was over yesterday and redd up the yard n'at, and he says the gutters need cleaned, but he's not goin' up on that ladder, it's slippy from the rain. The lady across the street sat on her porch the whole time watchin' him. She's so nebby. She asked me was he sick, why was he workin'.
I went dahn the Strip with the girls from church and got chipped ham. I'd send you some but you know what happened last time.
Did you see they're buildin' the new ballparks? There's cranes all over the North Side. Your father wouldn't know the place.
The Stillers are on tonight in Cleveland. Are yinz gettin' it on the TV aht there? Call me after. No, don't call me after, it'll be late. Call me tomorrow.
Okay. Put Rosa on. Did you eat? I love you. Put Rosa on."
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FINAL EXAM
Translate into Pittsburghese, in two words:
"Pardon me, sir, I believe your trousers are unfastened."
ANSWER KEY (IN PHOENIX)
| 1 | Would you all like a soda? |
| 2 | Clean up your room. |
| 3 | Be careful, those steps are slippery. |
| 4 | Get a shopping cart. |
| 5 | The car needs to be washed. |
| 6 | Please hand me a rubber band so I can close this bag of chips. |
| 7 | She is so nosy that she knows who called before the telephone stops ringing. |
| 8 | Turn off the outside faucet; the hose is running into the briars. |
| 9 | We're going downtown for the parade and so forth. |
| 10 | Please pick up a pound of bologna and a pound of very thinly sliced chopped ham, and don't forget the buns. |
| 11 | Children, tidy up those toys and get out of the creek before your father gets home. The Steelers game starts at one. |
| 12 | The vacuum cleaner needs to be emptied and the dog would like to be walked. |
| 13 | Excuse me, your fly is open. (Pittsburghers are not rude. We are efficient.) |
| Call | I miss you. I worry about you in that heat. Your brother is a good boy. The neighbor is nosy. The city is changing. I still can't mail you chipped ham, because in July of 1992 I did, in a padded envelope, and we don't talk about it. Watch the game. I love you. Now let me talk to your wife.
Shorter translation: I love you, and so does everything else on the South Side. |
| Exam | Kennywood's open. |
YOUR GRADE
All of them, and you didn't peek: you can come home. Your mother has your room ready.
Ten to thirteen: you'd pass at a Stillers game if you kept quiet during the timeouts.
Five to nine: you've been to Pittsburgh. Maybe for a wedding.
Under five: you're from Phoenix, and that's all right, hon. So are my students, and my wife is from Tucson, which is close enough, and I love them all anyway. Go back to the dictionary and start at babushka.
<< Back to the Dictionary
Want to send me a practice sentence of your own? [email protected]
Last updated Sunday, September 19, 1999
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