The Countdown

twelve chemo days, twelve movies, twelve snacks, and everybody who drove me
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My mom taped a calendar to the fridge with all twelve chemo days circled in purple marker, and every time I finished one I got to draw a big teal X through it. This is that calendar, sort of, with extra info.
The cancer center had a TV and a VCR on a rolling cart, and the treatment took a few hours, so I brought a movie every time. Snacks were whatever I could stand that day, which was a very short list. And every single time, somebody drove me there and sat with me and drove me home, because you're not supposed to drive yourself after. Here's every one of them. Thank you. I mean it.
#1
Tuesday, November 10, 1998
Movie: Titanic (both tapes)
Snack I could stand: saltines
Who drove: Mom
The first one. I was so scared I shook. Mom held my hand through the whole first tape. By the iceberg I was asleep. I've still never seen the end of this movie while conscious.
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#2
Tuesday, November 24, 1998
Movie: Clueless
Snack I could stand: lemon drops
Who drove: Dad
Thanksgiving was two days later. I ate mashed potatoes and nothing else and it was the best meal of my life. Hair started coming out that weekend.
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#3
Tuesday, December 8, 1998
Movie: The Princess Bride
Snack I could stand: a plain bagel
Who drove: Grandma Sylvia
First one bald! Wore the Rockies cap. Grandma quoted the whole movie along with it and the nurses started doing it too.
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#4
Tuesday, December 22, 1998
Movie: It's a Wonderful Life
Snack I could stand: a candy cane (peppermint helps)
Who drove: Jaime!!!
My roommate drove four hours over the mountains on her winter break to sit with me. Three days before Christmas. I cried at the movie and at her, in that order.
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#5
Tuesday, January 5, 1999
Movie: Grease
Snack I could stand: ginger ale & pretzels
Who drove: Aunt Helen
New Year's was boring because I was asleep by nine. Aunt Helen sang every song. Every one.
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#6
Tuesday, January 19, 1999
Movie: Sense and Sensibility
Snack I could stand: applesauce
Who drove: Mom
End of cycle three, which means HALFWAY. Tired. Mom and I agreed we would both marry Colonel Brandon.
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#7
Tuesday, February 2, 1999
Movie: Jerry Maguire
Snack I could stand: grape Popsicles
Who drove: Dad
Two days after the Broncos won the Super Bowl. Wore the Broncos cap. The nurses cheered. Dad cheered louder.
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#8
Tuesday, February 16, 1999
Movie: Beauty and the Beast
Snack I could stand: Goldfish crackers
Who drove: Hazel from church
Hazel is 56 and had somehow never seen this one, and now she's obsessed. We watched it twice. Four to go.
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#9
Tuesday, March 2, 1999
Movie: Romy and Michele's High School Reunion
Snack I could stand: dry Cheerios
Who drove: Tyler
My best friend from high school, home on his spring break. He laughed so loud a nurse came in to check on us. I love this movie.
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#10
Tuesday, March 16, 1999
Movie: The Sound of Music
Snack I could stand: lime Jell-O
Who drove: Grandma Sylvia
Bad week. Counts low, so tired I slept through the whole first half. Grandma narrated the parts I missed. Two left.
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#11
Tuesday, March 30, 1999
Movie: Men in Black
Snack I could stand: frozen grapes
Who drove: Joel
My little brother on his spring break, with his brand new driver's license and his newly grown-back hair. He drove five under the limit the whole way. ONE LEFT.
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#12
Tuesday, April 13, 1999
Movie: The Wizard of Oz
Snack I could stand: CAKE. (Finally hungry!)
Who drove: Mom, Dad AND Jaime
THE LAST ONE!!! Jaime drove over as a surprise. The nurses gave me a certificate and sang. When Dorothy got home I cried so hard I had to pause it. There's no place like it.
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Final score: 12 movies (2 I partly slept through), 12 snacks, 8 different drivers, 31 baseball caps, 1 Porter, 0 regrets about the wig decision.
Then radiation, every weekday for about a month. I didn't keep a calendar for that. It was the same thing every day, and I drove myself, and I listened to the same tape the whole time (my brother's, and I'm not telling you which, because he'd kill me).
And then August, and the scans, and the word CLEAR. Mom took the chemo calendar off the fridge and put it in my baby book. I'm not kidding. It's in there between my first tooth and my kindergarten report card.
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Last updated Tuesday, September 21, 1999
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