I taught home economics at a junior high here in Akron for thirty years, from 1968 until I retired in June of 1998. In that time I taught something like four thousand twelve- and thirteen-year-olds to thread a needle, measure flour, and not set the classroom on fire. Mostly.

You'd think retirement would mean people stopped asking me things. It did not. I get asked at church, in the grocery line, at the post office, and once at a funeral home. How do you fold a fitted sheet, Margaret? How do I get the ketchup out? Why is my VCR blinking? My husband Richard finally said, "Put it all on the computer and just tell people the address." So here it is.

Every card below has two parts. First, the honest steps, the way I taught them, and they work. Then, because I am fifty-seven and I've learned a thing or two about life, a Plan B, for when the honest steps have defeated you and you'd like to get on with your day. There's no shame in Plan B. I've used every one of them.

Each card has a difficulty rating in thimbles, one thimble for easy and five for "make a cup of tea first."

The Recipe Box: Fitted Sheet · Ketchup · End of the Tape · VCR Clock · Button · Stuck Jar · Readers' Questions

This is the one I get asked about most, and the one that makes grown women want to cry in the linen closet. It can be done. Here's how.

1. Stand up. Hold the sheet inside out by the two corners of one short end, one hand tucked inside each corner like a mitten.
2. Bring your hands together and fold one corner over the other, so the corner in your left hand slips inside the one in your right. The top one will turn right side out. That's what you want.
3. Let the sheet hang. Find the corner at the other end of the long side that's hanging below your doubled-up corner. Tuck your doubled corner into it the same way.
4. Do the same with the last corner. All four corners are now nested together in one hand.
5. Lay the sheet on a bed or table. You'll have a rough rectangle with a curved, elastic edge along one side. Fold that elastic edge in so all four sides are straight, and smooth it flat.
6. Fold it in thirds the long way, then in half or in thirds again until it's the size of your flat sheets. Smooth it each time.

Ketchup is one of those foods that thickens when it sits still and loosens up when it's jostled. The science teacher across the hall called it "thixotropic." I taught across the hall from him for twenty years and I still can't say it fast.

1. Glass bottle: with the cap on, give it a good shake first to get it moving.
2. Take off the cap and hold the bottle at a slant over your plate, about halfway between upright and upside down. Not straight down.
3. With two fingers of your other hand, tap the neck of the bottle firmly, up near the top, a few times. Tap the neck, not the bottom. Smacking the bottom works too, eventually, and then it all comes at once, usually onto your good blouse.
4. If it's a brand-new bottle and nothing will budge, slide a clean table knife or a drinking straw down into the neck to let some air in, then try again.
5. Squeeze bottle: keep it upside down on its cap in the refrigerator door, and it'll be ready when you are.

1. Hold the roll up to a window or a lamp and turn it slowly. The cut end will catch the light as a thin line across the roll.
2. No luck? Run your thumbnail lightly around the roll, going the same direction the tape unwinds. When you feel a tiny ridge catch, that's it.
3. Lift the end with your fingernail. Gently. If it tears crooked, you'll be back at step one.
4. Now the important part. When you're done, fold the last quarter inch of the end under itself to make a little tab, or stick it down over a paper clip. The next person to use the tape will love you. That person is usually you.

Every VCR is a little different, which is the whole problem. But almost all of them go like this:

1. Find the instruction booklet. It's in the kitchen drawer with the warranty cards, the birthday candles and the rubber bands. Look under the rubber bands.
2. Turn on the VCR and the TV, and set the TV to the channel your VCR uses (usually 3 or 4).
3. Press MENU on the VCR or the remote. If there's no MENU button, look for one that says PROGRAM or CLOCK.
4. Use the arrow buttons (or the channel up and down buttons) to pick CLOCK SET or TIME/DATE, and press ENTER or SELECT.
5. Set the hour with the arrows. Watch the AM and PM. Press ENTER to move on to the minutes, then the date and year if it asks.
6. Press MENU or EXIT to save it. Some of them need it pressed twice. If the clock goes back to blinking, it didn't save, and you start over at step 3.
7. Some of the newer machines will set themselves. Look in the booklet for something called "auto clock."

And then the power will blink in the next thunderstorm, and it will say 12:00 again. That's not you. That's the VCR.

You need: a needle, about 24 inches of thread that matches, the button, and a straight pin or a toothpick.

1. Thread the needle and pull the thread through until both ends meet. Knot the two ends together. Now you're sewing with a double thread, which is stronger.
2. Find where the button goes. Usually you can see the little holes where the old one was.
3. Starting from the back of the fabric, push the needle up through the fabric and through one hole in the button. Pull until the knot stops you.
4. Lay the pin or toothpick across the top of the button. Sew down through the hole across from the one you came up through, over the pin, and back up. Do this five or six times. On a four-hole button, then do the other pair of holes the same way. Look at the other buttons on the shirt and copy whether they make an X or two lines.
5. Pull out the pin. Bring the needle up through the fabric but not through the button, so it comes out underneath it. Wind the thread around the stitches under the button three or four times. This makes a little stem, called a shank, so the button has room to go through the buttonhole without puckering.
6. Push the needle through to the back, take two or three tiny stitches in the same spot, knot it, and snip.

1. Run hot tap water over just the lid for half a minute or so. The metal lid expands a little more than the glass does, and that loosens it. Dry the lid and your hands well.
2. Get a good grip. A rubber dishwashing glove, a wide rubber band around the lid, or a damp dish towel all work.
3. Still stuck? Break the seal. Slide the tip of a spoon or a butter knife just under the edge of the lid and pry gently, in two or three places around it, until you hear a little pop or hiss. That's the vacuum letting go, and after that it'll turn easily.
4. Or tap the edge of the lid firmly on the counter, all the way around, a few times, and try again.