Bad Coffee and Good People

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The Chips
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At my home group they hand out chips for milestones in the first year, and a bronze coin on your anniversaries after that. Every group does it a little different. I keep mine in an old cigar box on my dresser, which is funny if you think about it. Here's the story that goes with each one.

24 hours September 1997	My first meeting. They asked if anybody was there for the first time, or had come back and wanted to start over, and did they want a chip. I didn't move. Earl picked one up and put it in my hand. I held on to it so hard it left a mark.
30 days end of September 1997	The longest I'd gone without a drink since I was nineteen. I slept like a rock for the first time in years and dreamed about drinking every single night. Earl said that was normal and to call him when I woke up. I called him at 5 a.m. about six times that month.
90 days Thanksgiving 1997	My ninety days landed on Thanksgiving. I went to a meeting at 10 in the morning, then to my mom's for dinner, and drank so much iced tea I couldn't sleep. My mom cried when I said grace. I don't think she'd heard me pray since I was a boy.
6 months February 1998	The shine wore off. Things were supposed to be better and my bank account didn't know it yet. This was the hardest stretch for me. I kept going to meetings mostly out of stubbornness. Stubbornness counts.
9 months May 1998	Started working on making amends. First one was to a contractor I'd shorted on a job in 1994. I paid him back in cash, with interest, and he shook my hand and said he'd always wondered what happened to me. Walked out to my truck ten pounds lighter.
1 year August 1998	My daughter came to my first anniversary. She sat in the back row by the door, right where I sat my first night, and she clapped louder than anybody. Then we went for pancakes. I'm not ashamed to say I cried into my hash browns.
18 months February 1999	A young guy started calling me. Twenty-six years old, drinking like I used to. I didn't know what I was doing but I did what Earl did for me: sat with him, gave him bad coffee and my number. He's at seven months now. I'm prouder of his seven months than my eighteen.
2 years August 30, 1999	Earl gave me my coin. His hands shake a little now, he's 73. He said "see you tomorrow," like always, and that's the whole secret as far as I can tell. I'm not sober for two years. I'm sober for today, and I've had a lot of todays in a row.

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Last updated September 1, 1999
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