Hi!! Welcome to my home page! I wanted to make a page about me, but when I sat down to write it I realized the most interesting thing about me is the eight tomato plants behind the garage. So here they are. They have agreed to be interviewed. Well, most of them.

BRANDYWINE
Personality: DIVA.
Brandywine is an old heirloom with big pink tomatoes and leaves like a potato plant, and she knows she is special. She needs the good stake. She needs the sunny corner. She needs to be told she is beautiful every morning or she drops her blossoms out of spite. She did not make a single tomato until the middle of August. Then she made three. Each one weighs about a pound and she has not stopped talking about it. Honestly, they were the best tomatoes I have ever eaten, and she knows it, and that's the problem.

EARLY GIRL
Personality: Teacher's pet.
First one with a ripe tomato every single year. Had a red one before the middle of July and made sure the whole yard knew. Sits in the front row. Raises her hand.

SWEET 100
Personality: Had too much sugar.
A cherry tomato plant that has made approximately nine thousand tiny tomatoes and wants you to look at every single one of them. Has climbed over the fence into the Hershbergers' yard. I have apologized. The Hershbergers are eating well.

ROMA (x2)
Personality: Sensible shoes.
The twins. They do not want attention. They do not want compliments. They just want to be sauce. I respect that.

BETTER BOY
Personality: Golden retriever.
Happy all the time. Makes lots of nice red tomatoes. Never complains. If Better Boy had a tail he would wag it. Everybody's favorite except Brandywine, who will not look at him.

BIG BOY
Personality: Exactly what it sounds like.
Got knocked flat when the rain from Hurricane Floyd came through last week. Lying down in the mud like a teenager on a Saturday. I stood him back up and told him I believed in him.

MR. STRIPEY
Personality: Class clown.
Yellow and red striped tomatoes. Looks like a sunset. Looks like a beach ball. Nobody at church believes he's real. I brought one to the covered-dish supper as proof and a lady from the choir poked it.

My husband Rusty thinks I talk to the tomatoes too much. I told Brandywine what he said and she agreed with him, which frankly hurt. Rusty's exact words were "Nadine, you said goodnight to the Romas." Well Rusty, they're TWINS, you can't say goodnight to one and not the other.

Rusty does eat a tomato sandwich every single day from July to September, so I don't know what he's complaining about.

Ryan is 16 and says the garden is "fine I guess." Megan is 12 and calls the tomatoes "Mom's other children." She says they are my favorites. This is not true. It is only a tiny bit true in August.