The Bus Stop: The Kenny Log

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THE KENNY LOG
every way I've personally watched the kid go
back to The Bus Stop

Kenny dies in almost every episode. Stan and Kyle yell the same two lines about it every time (you know the ones), a couple of rats usually show up, and next week he's back at the bus stop like nothing happened. Nobody ever explains it. That's the best part.

This log is only the ones I've seen myself and remember for sure. I missed a lot of season 1 when it first aired and the tapes going around my floor have holes in them, so this is not complete. If you know one I'm missing, e-mail me with the episode and what happened and I'll add it with your name.

Parka rating: how good the death is, 1 to 5 parkas.

Episode	What happened	Parkas
The very first one (the aliens one, season 1)	Stampeding cows and then Officer Barbrady's squad car, back to back. It took two tries to get him, which set the tone for everything after.	4
Pinkeye (season 1)	The Russian space station Mir falls out of the sky and lands on him. Then a mix-up at the funeral home with a bottle of Worcestershire sauce turns him into a zombie. Two for one.	5 (the champ)
Mr. Hankey, the Christmas Poo (season 1)	Nothing! He lives! The whole lounge sat there waiting for it and it never came. Christmas miracle.	0 (bonus points for the suspense)
Spontaneous Combustion (season 3)	He's the first one in town to burst into flames, right at the start. Efficient.	3
The movie (June 1999)	SPOILERS. A stunt with a lighter goes very wrong, he ends up in the hospital, and the doctors put a baked potato where his heart should be. It does not work. He spends the movie somewhere much warmer than Colorado. At the very end you finally see what's under the hood. The lounge went dead silent.	5

THEORIES FROM THE LOUNGE

Mike (2nd floor): Kenny is immortal and only the four of them remember he died.
My roommate: there are hundreds of Kennys and the McCormicks just keep a closet full of orange parkas.
Me: it doesn't need explaining. It's a cartoon about third graders in Colorado. Let the kid rest. Until next Wednesday.

Reader-submitted deaths waiting to be checked: I've got about a dozen e-mails in my inbox with ones I haven't seen yet. I don't put anything up until I've watched it myself or two different people tell me the same thing. Keep them coming.

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Log last updated September 22, 1999