Scouts and Medics carry concussion grenades. Thrown at the other team, a conc knocks them around and scrambles their aim for a few seconds. Used on yourself, it's the fastest way across any map in the game. A good conc jump gets a Scout from the middle of 2fort to the enemy's front door before their Sniper can find him.

The handheld conc:

1. Prime the conc and don't throw it. Hold onto it.
2. Start running the way you want to go. The faster you're moving, the farther it throws you.
3. Count. The fuse is the same every time, and you'll learn it. Right before it goes off, jump.
4. It blows up in your hand while you're in the air and you go flying. Don't touch anything until you land.

Getting it wrong: too early and you're on the ground when it goes, and you go sideways into a wall. Too late and you just stand there wobbling while their Soldier lines you up. Everybody does both of these about two hundred times. Get it out of your system on an empty server, not in a scrim.

Medics: same trick, and a Medic who can conc is worth two who can't. Get to the fight first, heal whoever's there, and infect the first guy who shoots at you.

With two Engineers we run two guns. With one, we run one. Never zero.

Gun one goes in the flag room. Back it into a corner where it can see every way in and nobody can get behind it. This is the last thing between their capper and our flag. If you only have time to build one gun, this is the one.

Gun two covers the ramp room. That's where everybody comes in from the front door. A gun there makes their offense fight before they ever get near the flag, and it gives our HWGuy something to stand next to.

Not on the battlements. Every new Engineer wants to put a gun up top where it can see the bridge. Every Sniper and every Soldier on the other team can see it too. It lasts about a minute. We tried it in 1997. We tried it again in April. It still lasts about a minute.

The water. Somebody always comes up through the water. Kaboomski keeps pipes at the exit, or Pierogi parks himself where he can hear the splash. Don't let the Engineer's gun get distracted looking the wrong way.

Keep it up. Get the gun to its top level as fast as you can, so it fires rockets. Keep your wrench on it when it's getting hit. Put your dispenser behind the gun, not in front of it, so our guys can stock up without standing in the line of fire. Ratchet says dispenser first. Pierogi says gun first. They have agreed to disagree.

Disguise. Pick their team and a class. It takes a few seconds, so do it before they can see you, not after. Once you're done, you look like one of them.

Pick the right class. Their Engineer or their Medic. Nobody looks twice at a Medic. Don't be their HWGuy unless you can walk as slow as an HWGuy. A Heavy running past at full speed is a Spy, and everybody knows it.

Attacking blows your cover. Save it for the one that counts. The knife from behind is the one that counts.

Feign death. You drop like you got shot. Defense walks right past you. Wait. Wait some more. Get up when they've stopped looking. Don't fall in a doorway where somebody has to step over you.

That's it. The rest you learn by getting caught.

Sniper: leg shots slow a capper down. Slow cappers die.

Soldier: rocket jumping costs you health. Don't do it if you're already hurt.

Demoman: a pipe trap is a promise. Stay close enough to keep it.

HWGuy: you're slow. Don't chase. Let them come to you.

Pyro: set the room on fire and get out of the way of whoever's actually going to kill them.

Medic: heal first. Then infect. Then heal again.